Canoeing in Maine (part 2)- A Memoir

A Ride With Divine

The first year we went to Maine we headed for the town of Springfield, where the put-in was for this particular trip. We were so up and excited, we drove over 100 miles past the exit we wanted and never realized it until we saw the sign for Baxter State Park. Oh, well!

After we unloaded our gear at the put-in I had to drive the car to the take-out and hitchhike back almost 100 miles. I got several short rides. Then this old beater driven by this incredibly ugly woman, who reminded me very much of Divine, stopped. She asked, “Where you going?” “Springfield,” I said. “Get in.” I did, and off we went.

We made small talk for a minute or two, and then she asked me if I wanted a beer. When I said, “Sure,” she stopped at a country store and and bought some. I began to realize I might have a problem.

As she drank and drove she started coming on to me, telling me how lonely she was away up there in Maine. The repulsive creature wanted me to poke her right then and there, in the back seat of her Gremlin! She hadn’t bought enough beer, I’ll tell you that.

All I wanted from this chick was to be delivered to Jimmy. When we got to Springfield she very graciously drove me about twelve miles down the dirt road that I was sure that I would have to walk, practically right up to the canoe. I thanked her and hopped out of the car, into the canoe. What happened to the still unsatisfied Divine look-alike remains a mystery. Jim and I were off on our first big canoe adventure!

she wanted to have sex with this?

The following year the plan was different. It was a BOLD plan! Jim and I would drive to Fort Kent where we would hire a pilot and fly into Fifth St. John’s Pond. Originally I objected to this plan on financial grounds (I couldn’t afford it) but Jim said he’d pay, so the deed was done.

The pilot dropped us off at Fifth St. John’s Pond. When the plane flew off without us I was jubilant! As soon as we hit the shore I took off all my clothes and laid out to get a full body tan. Jimmy mumbled something about my being incredibly rude, but within five minutes he was buck naked too.

John Kumiski
http://www.spottedtail.com/

All content in this blog, including writing and photos, copyright John Kumiski 2011. All rights are reserved.

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